Well, it's finally happening.
I'm officially moved in!!
That's right. I'm sitting in my dorm. Right now. Typing this.
It's pretty amazing.
I love my roommate, we're getting along so well.
And I've seen some of my friends already, so that's good.
I am having an internet problem though.
Facebook won't let me do anything.
This makes me sad.
I can pretty much do everything else but Facebook.
And I've been trying to solve this problem for the past hour now.
And I still haven't gotten anything.
I'm almost ready to give up for the night.
Boo Facebook, you anger me.
But my roommate's Facebook works.
So, WTF.
But that's all for now.
More dorm stories to come!!
I love the Fresh Life<3
Love,
Brittany Lauren
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Last Weekend
This weekend was the last weekend I'll be home for a month of so.
Four more sleeps, and I'm headin' up to NAU.
There is just one thing I'm worried about.
As all my friends leave for college, I've been telling them good luck and tell me all about it.
But as my time comes nearer, I feel like that won't happen to me.
I feel like people are going to forget because they're so busy with their new college lives, that they're not gonna have the time to tell me good luck and best wishes.
I think that scares me the most about leaving.
I'm one of those people who need encouragement to accomplish something. Not a lot of it, just enough to know that someone believes in me and they know I can do a good job. Without it, I feel like a failure in progress. And that never turns out good.
I really hope I get the encouragement I need and deserve. If I don't, it would seem to me that people don't care about me as much as I care about them...
Four more days, can't wait!
Love,
Brittany Lauren
Four more sleeps, and I'm headin' up to NAU.
There is just one thing I'm worried about.
As all my friends leave for college, I've been telling them good luck and tell me all about it.
But as my time comes nearer, I feel like that won't happen to me.
I feel like people are going to forget because they're so busy with their new college lives, that they're not gonna have the time to tell me good luck and best wishes.
I think that scares me the most about leaving.
I'm one of those people who need encouragement to accomplish something. Not a lot of it, just enough to know that someone believes in me and they know I can do a good job. Without it, I feel like a failure in progress. And that never turns out good.
I really hope I get the encouragement I need and deserve. If I don't, it would seem to me that people don't care about me as much as I care about them...
Four more days, can't wait!
Love,
Brittany Lauren
Sunday, August 15, 2010
As I Thought Everything Was Going So Well...
Not even a song can describe my feelings right now.
You know how you can be having a totally good day, then one little thing can just ruin it all.
Well, welcome to my life.
Today was a good day. Got more dorm things, bought some Toy Story Mac and Cheese, you know, the good things.
Well, suppertime came along, and I heard the things I begged him never to say again.
"You're getting fat, lose some weight." and "You better be hitting up the gym a lot at NAU."
Yes, my father pretty much calls me fat on a regular basis.
Even when I tell him to stop, he keeps rambling on, discussing my weight.
It's not like I go around they house and say "HEY DAD. Stop being an alcoholic. Stop smoking. Just stop!"
No, I'm the only person in the family that will stand by his side if people blow up at him.
And this is the thanks I get? Awesome.
I've never been more ready to leave than after tonight. Right now, my family is the last thing I wanna be with right now.
Don't get me wrong, I love them, but I'm getting sick and tired of how I'm being treated, especially when I'm leaving soon.
I should be hearing things like "I'm gonna miss you" or "I don't want you to go."
Instead I'm hearing "I'm not gonna miss you" and "Just leave now, no one wants you here."
That's right, not even my family wants me around...well this is just great.
Only 11 more days, then I'm gone. Then they'll be happy...
Love,
Brittany Lauren
You know how you can be having a totally good day, then one little thing can just ruin it all.
Well, welcome to my life.
Today was a good day. Got more dorm things, bought some Toy Story Mac and Cheese, you know, the good things.
Well, suppertime came along, and I heard the things I begged him never to say again.
"You're getting fat, lose some weight." and "You better be hitting up the gym a lot at NAU."
Yes, my father pretty much calls me fat on a regular basis.
Even when I tell him to stop, he keeps rambling on, discussing my weight.
It's not like I go around they house and say "HEY DAD. Stop being an alcoholic. Stop smoking. Just stop!"
No, I'm the only person in the family that will stand by his side if people blow up at him.
And this is the thanks I get? Awesome.
I've never been more ready to leave than after tonight. Right now, my family is the last thing I wanna be with right now.
Don't get me wrong, I love them, but I'm getting sick and tired of how I'm being treated, especially when I'm leaving soon.
I should be hearing things like "I'm gonna miss you" or "I don't want you to go."
Instead I'm hearing "I'm not gonna miss you" and "Just leave now, no one wants you here."
That's right, not even my family wants me around...well this is just great.
Only 11 more days, then I'm gone. Then they'll be happy...
Love,
Brittany Lauren
Thursday, August 12, 2010
The Weird Feeling
Lately, I've been having a weird feeling, and I don't even know how to describe it.
It's a mood where I wanna just lay down and relax, but at the same time go out and do something.
But mainly, I just wanna cry. Honestly.
Like, right now, for instance. I feel unwanted. I feel as if I don't belong in my group of friends.
They always seem to go out and do fun things together, and I'm either not invited but know about it, or I don't know about it at all until after the fact. And when they say "We're gonna be best friends forever," I sorta don't believe it, because I feel like I haven't seen actual proof of it yet.
I'm tired of being the one everyone has to poke fun at. I'm tired of being the butt of everyone's jokes. And I'm tired of getting weird looks from people while saying, "Okay Brittany" every time something comes out of my mouth.
Has it ever occurred to people that I may be serious? That not everything I say may be funny?
For once, I would like to have a conversation with someone who didn't laugh at everything I say. I would like not to be the dumb one in the group all the time. Basically, I would just like to have someone there for me. Not because they feel like they have to, but because they want to.
It's not like I wanna lose anyone, I just want some respect or something. I wanna feel...appreciated. And wanted. And needed.
But I just don't feel like I am. I'm sure I am with some people, but they do a poor job showing it if that's the case.
This weird feeling is just taking a toll on me. Anything that comes to my head is basically shoved out with a "what's the point" behind it. There's really nothing I can do.
Anyway, about my life.
-Talked to my sister Tuesday. Yay.
-Ran around a lot yesterday.
-Got into a fight with my male BFF. Still haven't talked to him.
-Almost done packing!
-Already accomplished something on my Freshman must do list.
-Got more dorm stuff.
-Got my mail box and PO box!
That's about it. My life is dumb. The end.
Love,
Brittany Lauren
It's a mood where I wanna just lay down and relax, but at the same time go out and do something.
But mainly, I just wanna cry. Honestly.
Like, right now, for instance. I feel unwanted. I feel as if I don't belong in my group of friends.
They always seem to go out and do fun things together, and I'm either not invited but know about it, or I don't know about it at all until after the fact. And when they say "We're gonna be best friends forever," I sorta don't believe it, because I feel like I haven't seen actual proof of it yet.
I'm tired of being the one everyone has to poke fun at. I'm tired of being the butt of everyone's jokes. And I'm tired of getting weird looks from people while saying, "Okay Brittany" every time something comes out of my mouth.
Has it ever occurred to people that I may be serious? That not everything I say may be funny?
For once, I would like to have a conversation with someone who didn't laugh at everything I say. I would like not to be the dumb one in the group all the time. Basically, I would just like to have someone there for me. Not because they feel like they have to, but because they want to.
It's not like I wanna lose anyone, I just want some respect or something. I wanna feel...appreciated. And wanted. And needed.
But I just don't feel like I am. I'm sure I am with some people, but they do a poor job showing it if that's the case.
This weird feeling is just taking a toll on me. Anything that comes to my head is basically shoved out with a "what's the point" behind it. There's really nothing I can do.
Anyway, about my life.
-Talked to my sister Tuesday. Yay.
-Ran around a lot yesterday.
-Got into a fight with my male BFF. Still haven't talked to him.
-Almost done packing!
-Already accomplished something on my Freshman must do list.
-Got more dorm stuff.
-Got my mail box and PO box!
That's about it. My life is dumb. The end.
Love,
Brittany Lauren
Sunday, August 8, 2010
College Life: Freshman Year Must Do List
In no particular order:
1.Play in the snow.
2. Learn to snowboard.
3. Workout everyday.
4.Hangout with Courtney Ridgley at least five times before she graduates.
5.Make at least ten new friends, if not more.
6.Apply for SSP staff.
7. Find a way to get back to NAU after the Carrie Underwood concert.
8. Get a job.
9.FINALLY get my butt to Eugene to visit Heather.
10.Get into a sorority
11.Meet a boy.
12.Make a new best friend.
13. Get Heather to get her butt to NAU to play in the snow with me.
14. Dates with the Gilbert girls.
15. Get Laney to come to NAU.
16. Not lose touch with any of my old friends.
17.ZUMBA.
18.Finally get to making Heather a new bracelet.
19.Not fail anything.
20. Make this the best first year of college EVER. :)
Keep coming back to this post, as the things that are accomplished will be crossed off :)
Love,
Brittany Lauren
1.
2. Learn to snowboard.
3. Workout everyday.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8. Get a job.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13. Get Heather to get her butt to NAU to play in the snow with me.
14.
15. Get Laney to come to NAU.
16. Not lose touch with any of my old friends.
17.
18.
19.
20. Make this the best first year of college EVER. :)
Keep coming back to this post, as the things that are accomplished will be crossed off :)
Love,
Brittany Lauren
Saturday, August 7, 2010
July. What a month.
To me, it seems like the days went by super fast, but it feels like events such as SSP were longer than just a month ago. I don't even know where to begin in this crazy month.
July 2nd was our big day, SSP! We went to the airport at about noon, ate lunch, and made our way to San Francisco. Maddie, Ashley, and I wore flowers in our hair, the only way to go to SanFran. When we got there, the McClain family met us, and we sat around while we waited for our enormous grey van, like so.
Me. Waiting to go and sleep.
The graduates, the Gilbert girls.
The whole gang!
The van FINALLY came and we were on our way, out of our way, actually, to Monterey for a Christian festival. We stayed at a cabin in Aptos, CA, we like to call it "the creepy Grandma house." And boy, was it creepy. It had so many stairs, a windy staircase, and it just smelled and looked like a place where a Grandma would live. Finally, we got some sleep, and prepared ourselves for the next morning.
Saturday, we headed to the Mazda Speedway to Spirit West Coast, that was something. We honestly didn't want to be there, so we went to the Fisherman's Wharf in Monterey. There were so many seals!!!
They were so silly! They're piling on top of each other, and making weird noises. We loved those seals.
Sunday, we finally head up to Loleta for SSP! We were a little late, but we weren't the last, luckily. I can honestly say that week made my day, if not my life. I had the best work group anyone can ask for. THUG LIFE!
I'm truly blessed to now have these people in my life. I love each and everyone of them! :)
Although my last year was a sad one, I looooved the staff. They made the week so much fun! These people made me happy everyday.
And as the week came to a close, I got myself ready to be an SIT at the Zona site. That staff was lovely as well! I couldn't imagine being on staff with anyone else for a week. These people made me apart of their family, and I felt like I fit in, which is a major plus. It was fun getting to know the campers too, I'm really glad I got to learn all of their names. I have a feeling I'll be ready to take on staff next year! I also got the three best pieces of mail. Ever. One was from one of my best friends, Stephanie. She was going to send me puppy chow, but didn't. But I did get a nice letter which made me smile. I also got a letter from another one of my best friends, Maddie. In it was a lovely letter, and a Dove chocolate inspirational wrapper, which was perfect for the service I was doing. The last piece of mail was from my older sister/best friend Heather, and I'm pretty sure it's my fav. She sent me a burned CD full of NSYNC Christmas! YAAAY! I've been listening to it everyday. I love it. Mail makes me happy.
Downsides, I've never been more than ready to move out in my entire life. Struggles with my family, I just need to get out. Only 19 more days, and I start the college life. Yip yip!
Well, that's all for now. More soon :)
Love,
Brittany Lauren
July 2nd was our big day, SSP! We went to the airport at about noon, ate lunch, and made our way to San Francisco. Maddie, Ashley, and I wore flowers in our hair, the only way to go to SanFran. When we got there, the McClain family met us, and we sat around while we waited for our enormous grey van, like so.
Me. Waiting to go and sleep.
The graduates, the Gilbert girls.
The whole gang!
The van FINALLY came and we were on our way, out of our way, actually, to Monterey for a Christian festival. We stayed at a cabin in Aptos, CA, we like to call it "the creepy Grandma house." And boy, was it creepy. It had so many stairs, a windy staircase, and it just smelled and looked like a place where a Grandma would live. Finally, we got some sleep, and prepared ourselves for the next morning.
Saturday, we headed to the Mazda Speedway to Spirit West Coast, that was something. We honestly didn't want to be there, so we went to the Fisherman's Wharf in Monterey. There were so many seals!!!
They were so silly! They're piling on top of each other, and making weird noises. We loved those seals.
Sunday, we finally head up to Loleta for SSP! We were a little late, but we weren't the last, luckily. I can honestly say that week made my day, if not my life. I had the best work group anyone can ask for. THUG LIFE!
I'm truly blessed to now have these people in my life. I love each and everyone of them! :)
Although my last year was a sad one, I looooved the staff. They made the week so much fun! These people made me happy everyday.
And as the week came to a close, I got myself ready to be an SIT at the Zona site. That staff was lovely as well! I couldn't imagine being on staff with anyone else for a week. These people made me apart of their family, and I felt like I fit in, which is a major plus. It was fun getting to know the campers too, I'm really glad I got to learn all of their names. I have a feeling I'll be ready to take on staff next year! I also got the three best pieces of mail. Ever. One was from one of my best friends, Stephanie. She was going to send me puppy chow, but didn't. But I did get a nice letter which made me smile. I also got a letter from another one of my best friends, Maddie. In it was a lovely letter, and a Dove chocolate inspirational wrapper, which was perfect for the service I was doing. The last piece of mail was from my older sister/best friend Heather, and I'm pretty sure it's my fav. She sent me a burned CD full of NSYNC Christmas! YAAAY! I've been listening to it everyday. I love it. Mail makes me happy.
Downsides, I've never been more than ready to move out in my entire life. Struggles with my family, I just need to get out. Only 19 more days, and I start the college life. Yip yip!
Well, that's all for now. More soon :)
Love,
Brittany Lauren
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